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Yes Sir, I Speak English

Jul6

Written by:
2009/07/06 10:17 AM RssIcon

English has never been my best subject. I later found out that I am a bit dyslexic. Kind of strange that I started blogging. Spelling, grammar and syntax have always been a problem. As a result blogging is  a bit of a struggle for me. But we always feel better when we see someone else in a worse position than us.

My wife gets real irritated when printed and published material is incorrect, has bad spelling and horrific grammar. Especially true when there is a translation done to English from another language. It is even worse when done from something like Chinese to English. It is so bad that it is actually hilarious.

We found a packet, actually my sister did, of some water crystals, and the instructions on the back we translated directly into English from Chinese . Read below and you will understand what I mean. Enjoy.

Water Crystals  Huancai tm

Directions

  1. Affiliation clean water 1000ml to the Crystal mud soak 6-12 hours to filter the superfluous water.
  2. Flora that chooses fitly living the cool and damp environment, to washing their mud.
  3. Crystal Mud that already absorbs water to be put into the vase with the flora.
  4. The Crystal Mud appears the dry grain you may add water to afresh them.
  5. Periodically increases the plant nourishment liquid.
  6. Used for fresh cut flowers must be add more water.
  7. Used 180-360 days for the indoors.

Warning

  1. Kept away from sunshine stored at normal temperature.
  2. Kept away from children and pets.
  3. No suit to the plant that waste large quantity water.
  4. Handle it carefully, avoid the wastes jam the sewer.
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8 comment(s) so far...


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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

Funny - here in Spain we come across this all the time. Particularly in restaurants where someone "who speaks really good English" has made the translation. Just the other day we enjoyed "Small boy chickens, sunbathed whole."

By Mike CJ on  2009/07/06 10:52 AM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

HAHA, hilarious to say the least.
Quite a good literal translation, Chinese have more than 1 word for 1 English word though.
LOL. Still it's a good post.

By Abraham van der Linde on  2009/07/06 10:58 AM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

Yeah, living in China I see this all the time. The worst known case in China that I know of was in a hospital where the gynaecology department was labeled as "Cunt Examination". Pretty bad mistake!
Like Mike said, menus seem to be the best places to find poor translations into English.

By Gordie Rogers on  2009/07/06 02:39 PM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

I share your challenge with English/language and it has always caused frustration and communication difficulties. Writing for me is an exercise in patience as I repeatedly attempt to edit mangled thoughts.
It may have been this communication hardhip which served as a seed for ny need to share. Odd that the thing that makes blogging the most difficult for me may have been it's inspiration.
I blame my mis-writes on my brain moving faster than ny ability to documet the thought process. Add to that the occasional complete logic or descriptive breakdown.

By Mark Essel on  2009/07/06 04:50 PM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

Mark,

I share your thoughts. I maintain that my far superior brain is way to fast for my mouth or fingers to catch up. My brain is just light years ahead of the rest of my body

By Robert Bravery on  2009/07/06 08:54 PM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

Gordie,

Wow, that's a biggie. But then if you don't know what the word means. Like here in SA, our Afrikaans words are similar..
For the Federations cup, Kaka, the Brazillian player is extremely good. But 'kaka' in Afrikaans, is slang for ... well lets just say its slang for "number 2"

By Robert Bravery on  2009/07/06 08:57 PM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

Mike,

LOL, well at least you know know the "sex" of your whole sunbathed Chickens

By Robert Bravery on  2009/07/06 08:58 PM
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Re: Yes Sir, I Speak English

braham,
yeah thats normally the problem. More than one word. That's why understanding the context and grammar is probably more important than just knowing what the words mean.

By Robert Bravery on  2009/07/06 09:00 PM
 
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